To follow Bathsheba's story, please read 2 Samuel 11. Her devotional can be found on page 924 of the Catholic Women's Devotional Bible.
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Be honest: how many of you rolled your eyes when you read the title? I mean, Bathsheba? Why are we talking about her? She was a seductress, an adulterer. What sort of insight can her story possibly bring to our faith journey?
Welcome to my first thoughts. When I saw that Bathsheba was next on the list for my prayer group's study session, I questioned why she was even included in my bible's devotionals.
In this post, we'll discuss Bathsheba's importance and why so many of us have such icky feelings about her.
A quick bible plug before I continue with Bathsheba's story: All my reflections in this Women of the Bible series are coming from this Catholic women's devotional bible. It has a list of women's stories printed in the front index, and I'm going in alphabetical order. You don't have to have one in order to follow along, but it may help to understand some of my references. The nice thing about using this bible is that each featured woman has a devotional which includes the scripture reading where she is mentioned, the story retold in a more prose-like way (usually from the woman's perspective), and a prayer reflection based on the theme of her story.
Bathsheba's Story Recap
The wife of a soldier, Bathsheba caught King David's eye one day while she was bathing.
Gross.
While her husband was away at war, David made advances, they slept together, she got pregnant, and then David proceeded to trick her husband, Uriah, into sleeping with Bathsheba so everyone would think the baby was Uriah's. It didn't work. David moved Uriah to the front lines where he died and then took Bathsheba as his wife.
It's kind of like a biblical soap opera...Oh, the scandal of it all!
Reflection
So I was initially very judgey before reading and reflecting on her story. The scripture verses alone probably wouldn't have changed my opinion too much, but the devotional... oof. It had me wracked with guilt. Here's just a little snippet of what changed my mind:
Though the story gives us little insight into her true character, it is hardly likely that Bathsheba was in a position to refuse the king, whose power was absolute. Why then have so many people painted her as a seductress? Perhaps Bathsehba's innocence is too painful to face. That a good person can suffer such tragedies, especially at the hands of a godly person, appalls us.
So...yeah... In all the years I'd heard this story, I never once looked at it from Bathsheba's perspective. I simply assumed that she was just as culpable as David and wrote her off as a bad person.
Cue the feelings of guilt and shame.
How many times do we do this with women in our own lives? We judge. We look at a woman we barely know and decide right there what kind of person we think she is. Or worse still, someone else told us what kind of person they think she is, and we believe them without finding out for ourselves.
This is so dangerous.
This is so ugly.
We could be missing out on opportunities for beautiful, fulfilling relationships because we made a snap judgment based on appearances or hearsay. Bathsheba's story reminds us that there are always two sides. Always.
I remember reading once that our first thought about someone is what we are conditioned to think of them. Our second thought about them is our actual feeling. Here's a hypothetical example: I pass a woman in the "healthy aisle" of the grocery store. My first thought: "Oh, my gosh. She's so fat. Why is she even in this aisle?" My second thought: "Good for her for trying to eat healthily. I should try harder, too."
I try so hard to remember this when I find myself judging someone. I force myself past the ugly, conditioned first thought and onto the one I know to be truly mine. Not society's. Not the devil's. Mine.
I want to be a supporter of other women. I want to lift them up, to empathize, to fix their crowns. And this is what God calls us to do, too. He wants us to love first. He wants us to think for ourselves and not listen to gossip. He wants us to hear the other side of the story.
After reading and reflecting on Bathsheba, I had nothing but compassion for her and her situation. Her story taught me so much about myself. No one, no matter how faithful you may be, is exempt from judging others. We do it without realizing it, and that's the trap.
So, let's try something this Lent and continue it going forward. Let's challenge ourselves to be hyper-focused on our inner thoughts about others, especially the women in our lives. Let's condition ourselves to look at others with love first. Let's revisit a relationship with someone we wrote off and give them a second first chance. Let's be the women who fix other women's crowns.
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